Sarah Potter Writes

Pursued by the Muses of prose and poetry

#Dodoitsu 01 — The Rainbow

Time for me to introduce you to a form of Japanese poetry that was new to me, until BillyBuc at Artistry with Words mentioned it in a recent post. Thanks, Billy, and I’m sure you won’t mind if I quote you here:-)

Dodoitsu is a Japanese poetic form where the focus is on syllables instead of rhyme or meter.  Dodoitsu is a four-line poem which has seven syllables in each of the first three lines, and five syllables in the final line.  Traditionally, the Dodoitsu focuses on work or love, and it usually has a humorous twist.

So here you are, my first attempt at writing something in a Japanese poetic form other than haiku and tanka (though my US cousins might prefer to replace the word “moulded” with “molded”) …

Through the window, a rainbow
she is desperate to share.
Moulded in cushion comfort,
he prefers his tea.

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12 thoughts on “#Dodoitsu 01 — The Rainbow

  1. Well thank you for the mention and I love your response to the “challenge.” Well done, Sarah!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Ah, this is great! I love Japanese poetry. It just tugs at the boundaries of things – so many facets that emerge from between the short lines. Well done!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Nice job. Could never tell it was your first attempt. Always nice to meet an eccentric Brit. 😀 Eccentrics are my favorite people. I’ve often referred to myself as an oxymoron … a down-to-earth, eccentric. 🙂

    Thank you for stopping by my blog and nominating my book, Sarah.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Well done for trying a new poetic form Sarah and you definitely got the humour in there 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Sunshine Jansen on said:

    Wonderfully done, and a new form to me! I enjoy the forms that suggest a theme as I so often have no idea what I’m writing about. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you, Sunshine 🙂 Those moments when you’ve no idea what you’re writing about are probably ones where the literary Muse has 100% control over you. I love it when that happens, as everything written is a surprise to the author, so that when she reads it through she’s quite mystified as to the source of all those words! Keep at it. I love your writing 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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