Tanka #7

Metallic winter
enhanced by rhododendrons
— rejuvenation —
an old woman with grey hair
wearing neon pink lipstick.

Author: Sarah Potter Writes

Sarah is a British eccentric who writes offbeat fiction, haiku and tanka poetry. When stuck for words, she sketches or paints instead. She's into nature conservation, sustainability, gardening, dogs, natural health, and reading. Her sociability is something that happens in short bursts with long breathing spaces in between. View all posts by Sarah Potter Writes

19 thoughts on “Tanka #7”

Graphite Bunny says:

10/01/2013 at 6:15 pm

Beautiful contrast in images there. X

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1. sarahpotterwrites says:
  
  11/01/2013 at 12:22 pm
  
  Thank you 🙂
  Tanka, as a poetic form, is ideal for contemplating contrasts. In the middle of the 5-7-5-7-7 syllable structure, stands the pivotal “5”, over which you can do a sort of back-flip. I tend to think of it as 5-7 (5) 7-7, where there’s this line in the middle with two pairs of lines on either side.
  
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alarmingman says:

10/01/2013 at 11:24 pm

I agree with Graphite Bunny

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1. sarahpotterwrites says:
  
  11/01/2013 at 12:25 pm
  
  Thank you for a lovely seconding 🙂
  
  Have a look at what I’ve said to Graphite Bunny in my reply to him, which is also my reply to you!
  
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yerpirate says:

11/01/2013 at 5:22 pm

Backflip!? Oh dear! Looks very technical! Reminds me of a friend of mine who once told me she was determined to grow old disgracefully – gave me a chuckle. She said it while sitting in a half submerged ship in Azerbaijan that served as an illegal bar full of Chechen mafiosi, with a Cuban waitor…’sigh’…I miss those days…..

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1. sarahpotterwrites says:
  
  13/01/2013 at 3:06 pm
  
  …but have you still got the energy for more of “those days” or for “growing old disgracefully”? I’d never have had the courage to do some of the things you’ve done, being more of a gentle eccentric than a daring revolutionary!
  
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  1. yerpirate says:
    
    13/01/2013 at 9:05 pm
    
    You are admired, very much, for your skills and nature. The energy..oh I’ll find some…
    
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  2. sarahpotterwrites says:
    
    17/01/2013 at 3:34 pm
    
    🙂
    
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Crowing Crone Joss says:

12/01/2013 at 1:21 am

I love this.

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1. sarahpotterwrites says:
  
  13/01/2013 at 1:02 pm
  
  Thank you, Joss 🙂 It made me smile as I was writing it!
  
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David Kanigan says:

12/01/2013 at 11:52 am

Lovely Sarah.

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1. sarahpotterwrites says:
  
  13/01/2013 at 12:57 pm
  
  Thanks David 🙂
  
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Aurora HSP says:

14/01/2013 at 10:39 am

I LOVE this one, sweet Sarah! Beautiful brightness in motion 🙂

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1. sarahpotterwrites says:
  
  15/01/2013 at 7:41 pm
  
  Thank you, dear Janice 🙂 I seem to remember you like pink.
  
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  1. Aurora HSP says:
    
    16/01/2013 at 5:00 am
    
    I do have a thing for pink now! I couldn’t wear it much when I was younger but something’s changed and I can wear pinks now (old skin, lol, I dunno 😉 What a memory you have, see you again soon xo
    
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nightlake says:

04/02/2013 at 12:50 am

comparing the enhancements to an old woman..very interesting

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1. sarahpotterwrites says:
  
  04/02/2013 at 5:02 pm
  
  My mother wears lipstick that colour, although, very lucky for her, she still doesn’t have grey hair. She is also very beautiful. I think a splash of colourful pink lipstick enlivens and enhances a mature face, while cosmetic surgery slowly deadens it and removes character. Lines are fine.
  
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cindy knoke says:

03/08/2014 at 2:25 am

Love this!!! Kudos~

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1. sarahpotterwrites says:
  
  04/08/2014 at 2:16 pm
  
  If I’m allowed to have a favourite amongst my own poems, this is one of them. My mother has always liked bright pink lipstick and she’s very glamorous for her age.
  
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