Sarah Potter Writes

Pursued by the Muses of prose and poetry

Tanka #7

Winter Rhododendrons

Metallic winter
enhanced by rhododendrons
— rejuvenation —
an old woman with grey hair
wearing neon pink lipstick.

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19 thoughts on “Tanka #7

  1. Beautiful contrast in images there. X


    • Thank you 🙂
      Tanka, as a poetic form, is ideal for contemplating contrasts. In the middle of the 5-7-5-7-7 syllable structure, stands the pivotal “5”, over which you can do a sort of back-flip. I tend to think of it as 5-7 (5) 7-7, where there’s this line in the middle with two pairs of lines on either side.


  2. alarmingman on said:

    I agree with Graphite Bunny


  3. Backflip!? Oh dear! Looks very technical! Reminds me of a friend of mine who once told me she was determined to grow old disgracefully – gave me a chuckle. She said it while sitting in a half submerged ship in Azerbaijan that served as an illegal bar full of Chechen mafiosi, with a Cuban waitor…’sigh’…I miss those days…..


  4. Lovely Sarah.


  5. I LOVE this one, sweet Sarah! Beautiful brightness in motion 🙂


  6. comparing the enhancements to an old woman..very interesting


    • My mother wears lipstick that colour, although, very lucky for her, she still doesn’t have grey hair. She is also very beautiful. I think a splash of colourful pink lipstick enlivens and enhances a mature face, while cosmetic surgery slowly deadens it and removes character. Lines are fine.


  7. Love this!!! Kudos~


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