Friday Fictioneers — Beyond the Veil

Genre: Tragedy
Word Count: 100

BEYOND THE VEIL

Alice’s bridal veil hangs at the window, curtaining her off from the world.

Beneath a silvery moon her seducer had sung of love and sent her heart sailing over the rooftops, along with her brain.

If only clouds and rain had sheeted the moon in gloom that night, Alice would’ve hung on to her brain and her panties.

If only she’d worn a straitjacket for her hen night, she could have settled for mediocrity.

If only her fiancé had sent her heart sailing over the rooftops as her seducer had done.

Forever after, “if only” will be her daily mantra.

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Friday Fictioneers: 100 word stories
Photo Prompt: image copyright (c) Gah Learner

Author: Sarah Potter Writes

Sarah is a British eccentric who writes offbeat fiction, haiku and tanka poetry. When stuck for words, she sketches or paints instead. She's into nature conservation, sustainability, gardening, dogs, natural health, and reading. Her sociability is something that happens in short bursts with long breathing spaces in between.

36 thoughts on “Friday Fictioneers — Beyond the Veil”

  2. Dear Sarah,

    It’s sad when lust overpowers love. No doubt she would’ve had a better life with “mediocre.” So much said in so few words. Wonderful to see you back in the FridayFictioneersFold.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

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  3. Good morning Sarah! It appears to me that Alice has some explaining to do. 🙂 Love the opening image of the bridal veil….perfectly captures the painful and yet scintillating scene.

    Wishing you well, my dear friend!

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    1. Alice certainly does have some explaining to do, which I’m sure is why she has been in hiding for a long while … act in haste, and repent at leisure, and all that!

      I’ve been on holiday to see family and never got around to a catch-up on your blog before going. As a result, there are lots of your posts in my email inbox, not to be ignored forever. Bear with me a little longer, my dear friend. I thought it was about time to write another Friday Fictioneers story, to keep the old Muse ticking over. Have been working on the 2nd draft of my latest novel, too, in between post-holiday household jobs. Am feeling very refreshed and energised after my break, so am hoping that greater efficiency will result!

      Wishing a wonderful weekend, dear Bill.

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  5. Do you know, I want to take Alice and give her a good shaking? Not for her mistakes – we all make mistakes, sometimes on the grand scale – but for her submission to ‘If only…’. I like your take on the prompt, and I like the way you use Alice’s bridal veil, making it both an actual curtain and a metaphorical one, something flimsy between her and a fulfilling life. It hangs there in front of her eyes/mind, stopping her from seeing all the good things still open to her.

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    1. Constant dwelling on ‘If only(s)’ is a very unhealthy state to be in. I love it, Penny, when readers identify metaphors in my writing that I haven’t put there on a conscious level, so I must thank my literary muse for tapping into my subconscious and putting them there instead!

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    1. Thanks, Susan. Indeed, being unable to move on is a terrible waste of life. I’ve done it myself on a smaller scale in the past and it’s such a liberation to decide to dump all that nonsense and just get on with living. It’s not as if we are time-travellers who can go back and change anything.

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  15. I adore the line of the brain following the heart, and the one with the panties. People make mistakes, and if such mistakes are possible before the marriage, that marriage isn’t the right choice. I don’t like the word mediocre when describing people, it’s arrogant and it implies that she is feeling superiour. Is she, really, and why would that be? Great story, there’s so much in there.

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    1. Thanks, Gabi 🙂 I think Alice if feeling the opposite of superior and is searching for some self-justification for her actions to make her feel a little less shitty. (excuse my French!).

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    1. Thank you, dear Cybele:-) I liked writing that bit about panties, but wasn’t sure that some people would approve, although I’ve had no disapproving comments yet! Perhaps that is tempting providence to say so… 😉

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  17. What a drama, but I was laughing ( brain and panties). I would love it if she eloped with her seducer! But who knows, he might be as mediocre as her fiancee, just different 🙂 Anyway, a great story!

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    1. I’m glad you enjoyed this story, Inese 🙂 That’s a good observation of yours – the seducer might indeed have turned out as mediocre as her fiancee on a daily basis! He’d probably have been less dependable as well.

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